The Hammering Heart

Still beating.

A Stanza


Learning a lot about being fulfilled
A lesson I must have skipped over in school
Working for free can be freeing indeed
Provided you work for yourself

Book Update 1 – I swear I’m really working


It’s been over four months since I quit my job, and a few people have asked for updates on my book-writing endeavor. Here’s an update: writing a book is really hard and time-consuming. But I swear I’m still doing it. I will not have a first draft complete before needing to find a day job.

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Coffee Hell


Coffee is one of the most perfect foods I’ve ever known. It’s an incredible motivator. The prospect of coffee to come is almost as much of a morning stimulant as the drink itself. But I’ve been trying to stretch out my savings. It’s been a revealing exercise; I had a lot of routine expenses that were easy to shave off. I looked at my account the other day and realized that if I’d been making the same money I was making but living like this, I could have a pretty penny stowed away in a year’s time.

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The Crow


About two weeks ago my lady love noticed some odd splotches on the pavement here and there in front of our triplex.

“What’s wrong, dear? Found some schmutz?” I said.

“It looks like…blood,” she said with furrowed brow. I looked around and noticed several of the splotches on the driveway and trailing along toward our downstairs neighbors’ unit.

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More trials.

Early last week and late the week prior, I ate the following things, motivated in all cases by finances:

  • Some Taco Bell
  • A free chicken burrito from Chipotle
  • A free slice of pizza that looked like it’d been sitting there awhile
  • A sweaty old-fashioned donut from a donut shop downtown
  • Some rotisserie chicken from the poorly lit Safeway by our apartment
  • Some old halvah out of a can with a busted lid

Continue reading “Funemployment”

Treading Water


I’ve entered week three of my unemployment experiment, and it has been an ongoing test to my convictions. Not having an income is not a comfortable place for me. I’m treading water. I have been here before and knew that it would be uncomfortable and deliberately made my return to this uncomfortable place anyway. But lately the cosmos have been adding more sharks to the pool, just to make sure I really give a damn.

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Finales are Important

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I abandoned a life track recently, which my track record (hah) holds I do about once or twice a decade, and, like most things you only do once or twice a decade, still isn’t very easy.

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Now that I’ve quit my job to pursue writing, I’m trying to develop a new routine. I know I can count on myself to go stir crazy in a matter of hours, so my aim is for that routine to incorporate a rotating set of work venues. Today was the park downtown. It was my first time going to that park in the middle of the work day. It was real weird.

Continue reading “Compartmentalized”

Longer than a Tweet; ergo, blogworthy


Dear TheHammeringHeart,

On Friday I went to the Moscone Center to listen to people’s professional tips on how to play video games on the internet and also drew a horse with a flying V implant. Hebrew year 5787 is off with a bang.

Continue reading “Longer than a Tweet; ergo, blogworthy”

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